Oh, LDBCers. It’s only the second day, and the blood-dimmed tide rises anew. Susan Campbell Beachy, Sean and Nikki O’Connor, Sarah Wenk, Lee Ann Shollenberger, Michael Santoro. We’ve already lost both veterans and rookies alike to the usual suspects—Bing and Bowie, Faith Hill, the Harry Simeone Chorale, Bob Seger. And our fellow warriors have fallen at home, in retail establishments, at live events, in the car, while ice skating, and even at the library.
Of course, my grief didn’t prevent me from once again shoving my mug into the trusty old iSight for a Skype interview with the good people of Good Day Sacramento, however. They cared enough to check in on how this year’s struggle game is going, and they were able to patch me through from our East Coast Annex, better known as Mother LDBC’s house. So there’s that.
Anyway,as Mrs. LDBC has long said (or has said since at least yesterday, when she thought of it), may the odds be ever in your favor.
Thus, it begins. As of 12 am your time this morning (Black Friday, Nov. 29), it’s on—the fear is here.
Now, to paraphrase the noted philosopher Walter Sobchak, this is the LDBC. There are rules. So here’s a quick restating for easy reference and sharing:
Make it from 12 am the morning of Black Friday ’til 12 am the morning of Christmas Eve Day without hearing “The Little Drummer Boy,” and you win. As soon as you hear it on the radio, on TV, in a store or performed live—whatever—you’re out. And you record your loss on the official reporting form, then tell us all about it on the Facebook wall, along with the time and place of your demise. Be charming and creative enough, and we’ll also share it on the site, enshrining you in the Annals of LDBC Heroics, Tragedy, and Failure for all time.
And remember, you cannot be done in by anyone tricking you into hearing the dreaded tune or otherwise hitting you with it on purpose.
Again, live versions count, as do renditions and interpretations. (Yes, that means Vince Guaraldi’s “My Little Drum.”) Hearing it in TV episodes and movies is lethal, too, but parodies and samples are harmless.
Godspeed, LDBCers. Show the Boy who’s boss. And let’s be careful out there.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON’T WATCH THIS WHILE THE GAME IS IN SESSION (BLACK FRIDAY TO CHRISTMAS EVE)! CONTAINS LDB! YOU’LL DIE! I’M MAKING THIS AS UNPROFESSIONALLY RED AND NOTICEABLE AS I CAN—OBNOXIOUSLY RED AND NOTICEABLE, IN FACT! ALL FOR YOU! (YOU’RE JUST LUCKY I CAN’T MAKE IT BLINK.)
In a sweat lodge years ago, I saw a man-sized turkey, a beauteous Miles Standish, and hordes of people running in terror from a small child. I refused to tip my spirit guide, insisting that it was nonsense.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like off-kilter cards, and we here at LDBC Central are as off as off can be. As is our artist pal El Rey (creator of the delightful Drum Demon), who would like some help in choosing which of his designs to print and sell.
If you’re up for it, please take a moment to select your top-five favorites. (And five is all you can select since we’re authoritarian freaks.) If you have no ha’penny, no problem. You can find out how to download and print ‘em yourself here: http://mlkshk.com/p/VOEZ
Thanks, as always, people. And be ever-vigilant. Black Friday’s not far now.
Update: For some reason, the poll doesn’t seem to appear here or on Facebook if you’re using Chrome on the Mac, but Firefox and Safari render it just fine. Apparently, the good folks at Google fear the Boy as much as we do.
This is your planet on LDBC. Image courtesy AZRainman
While the malevolent Boy remains mostly an American problem, judging by this visual representation of the countries people visiting our beloved site hail from, the problem has evidently spread around the globe to some surprising places.
Canada’s no surprise, certainly. We’ve been sending nuisances and outright disturbances northward for hundreds of years now, and they, in turn, send us their best and brightest hockey players. The Aussies aren’t much of a shock, either, considering they have a long tradition of welcoming outside threats (house cats) when they’re not actively restocking their supply of native monstrosities (saltwater crocodiles, anyone?).
But Indonesia? Pakistan? Ghana? Bhutan? Latvia? Who knew the rhythmic little creep has such range?
I’ll shut up and let the flags speak for themselves, but look alive, faithful LDBCers. Even in the most far-flung lands, that rat-a-tat rat may find you.
Visits by country to LittleDrummerBoyChallenge.com since February 25, 2012